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Archive for November, 2010

Cracked Nuts! now hiring

Greetings fellow game nuts!  We are pleased to announce the impending
launch of a new gaming site called Cracked Nuts!
(http://www.crackednuts.net)  Unlike other game sites that we all know
of, Cracked Nuts! will not be politically correct, will be slightly
irreverant and totally honest in their game reviews.  Its going to be a
FUN site.

We are looking for people who want to write reviews, previews, articles,
editorials, columns, etc.  People who have an opinion and would like to
make it heard by all.  People with a great biting sense of humor without  
being insulting.

If you would like to work for what is sure to be one of the best, most
fun gaming sites around, send an email to j…@crackednuts.net with the
following information:

Full Name
Email address
Short paragraph or two on why you want to work for us and what you plan
to bring to the site

Those interested in reviewing games must be US residents (we will provide
the review copies). Columnists/writers do not have to be US residents.  
All applicants must be over 18 years of age.

Cracked Nuts!

posted by admin in Uncategorized and have Comments (9)


By claiming to possess an accredited Ph.D, whe he does not, Derek Smart has
violated the below Florida statue!

817.567  Making false claims of academic degree or title.–

(1)  No person in the state may claim, either orally or in writing, to
possess an academic degree, as defined in s. 246.021, or the title
associated with said degree, unless the person has, in fact, been awarded
said degree from an institution that is:

(a)  Accredited by a regional or professional accrediting agency recognized
by the United States Department of Education or the Commission on
Recognition of Postsecondary Accreditation;

(b)  Provided, operated, and supported by a state government or any of its
political subdivisions or by the Federal Government;

(c)  A school, institute, college, or university chartered outside the
United States, the academic degree from which has been validated by an
accrediting agency approved by the United States Department of Education as
equivalent to the baccalaureate or postbaccalaureate degree conferred by a
regionally accredited college or university in the United States;

(d)  Licensed by the State Board of Independent Colleges and Universities
pursuant to ss. 246.011-246.151 or exempt from licensure pursuant to s.
246.085; or

(e)  A religious seminary, institute, college, or university which offers
only educational programs that prepare students for a religious vocation,
career, occupation, profession, or lifework, and the nomenclature of whose
certificates, diplomas, or degrees clearly identifies the religious
character of the educational program.

(2)  No person awarded a doctorate degree from an institution not listed in
subsection (1) shall claim in the state, either orally or in writing, the
title "Dr." before the person’s name or any mark, appellation, or series of
letters, numbers, or words, such as, but not limited to, "Ph.D.," "Ed.D.,"
"D.N.," or "D.Th.," which signifies, purports, or is generally taken to
signify satisfactory completion of the requirements of a doctorate degree,
after the person’s name.

(3)(a)  A person who violates the provisions of subsection (1) or subsection
(2) commits a misdemeanor of the first degree, punishable as provided in s.
775.082 or s. 775.083.

(b)  In addition to any penalty imposed under paragraph (a), a violator
shall be subject to any other penalty provided by law, including, but not
limited to, suspension or revocation of the violator’s license or
certification to practice an occupation or profession.

History.–s. 2, ch. 89-40; s. 32, ch. 94-310.

posted by admin in Uncategorized and have Comments (24)

Spo²kie 5 Derek ZERO

 In the spirit of Derek Smart Fraud Day, I have looked back on the last
couple of months since I attempted to quantify my participation in the flame
war and have come up with the above score. For the edification of those who
are unaware or need reminding here are the incidents as they happened:

1) Derek contacts Mindspring complaining about my post, Referring to them as
"Libel". Mindspring tells him to grow up and use a kilfile. (Spo²kie 1,
Derek 0)

2) Derek claims to have access to my military records.  Fails to show any
information gained. (Spo²kie, 2 Derek 0)

3) Derek Claims to know where I live.  But can not even post street address
in a line up (Spo²kie 3 Derek 0)

4) Derek claims to have contacted the FBI concerning a perceived threat to
his person by me. Nothing follows (Spo²kie 4, Derek 0)

5) Derek Claims to be waiting on the State Attorney General to advise him on
what they plan to do. Nothing follows (Spo²kie 5, Derek 0)

Need more litigation threats go to


posted by admin in Uncategorized and have Comment (1)

Starfleet Command for sale


Brand New

Email me to inquire

Shipping and handling included, US residents only please

posted by admin in Uncategorized and have Comment (1)

[BC3K] Now this is funny…

  Found this admonition on the awesome BC3K website (www.bc3000ad.com for
those that don’t frequent it), under the commander roster.  BTW, what a
great place to harvest e-mail addresses of BC3K and PhDS lovers.  Completely
unprotected, no anti-spam measures.  Just grab the HTML and fire away (Oh
look, Eric Rotbard, Esq, friend of LIT registrar is a BC3K commander!  The
"Eradicator".  Hmmm…well, since Huffman and Spookie are still around, and
Louis still posts from AOL, I’d say he isn’t living up to his name.  Drop
him an e-mail…his addy is there too).  Too bad I’m currently out of my
great money-making weight loss product.  Maybe they’d be interested in lycra
vests, hoopy earrings, and socks?  Anyway, here’s the stern warning:


Apparently you can register as a commander and the registration isn’t
checked – it is immediately posted to the web site (check it and see!).
Don’t mess with PhDS, if you register as Commander Fuck of the USS Fuck You,
he will rat you out to the feds!  Omigod!  Please, don’t send "Nick" to my
door, I’ll be good.  You can’t even be disruptive (like PhDS is on the
newsgroups).  So registering as Commander PhDS of the USS Fraud will
probably get Janet Reno on your case.  I can see the call now:

PhDS:  "Hello, FBI?"
FBI: "Yes, how may I direct your call?"
PhDS: "Well, see, I have this web site and someone wrote a dirty word on it"
FBI: "Someone wrote a dirty word on the Internet?"
PhDS: "Yes, that’s right.  The IP address of the evildoer is"
FBI: "Hey, are you the same guy honored by the ‘Derek Smart Says Fuck You
PhDS: "Uh…."
FBI: "And what would you like us to do about this posting?"
PhDS: "Make him stop!"
FBI: "Ok, we’ll be happy to.  Which would you prefer we divert resources
from: tracking terrorists, abducted children, or murderers?"
PhDS: "Fucking detractor!"  <click>

PhDS: "Hello, FCC?"
FCC: "Yes, how may I direct your call?"
PhDS: "On my website, someone said I don’t have a PhD and called me a fraud"
FCC: "Do you have a PhD?"
PhDS: "Yes of course!"
FCC: "Where is it from?"
PhDS: "I can’t tell you"
FCC: "Would you like the number for your local mental health agency?"
PhDS: "Fucking detractor!" <click>

PhDS: "Hello, Mom?"
Momma Smart’s Voice Mail:  "Hello, you have reached the voice mail of Momma
Smart.  Press ’1′ if you’re not my son, press ’2′ if you’re calling for more
money, press ’3′ if you’re ready to admit you don’t have a PhD, press ’4′ if
you’d like me to send you some socks…"
PhDS: "Fucking detractor!" <click>

  Finally, I’m not familiar with the acronym "TOC".  Terms of…?  Please,
someone, enlighten me!  And if anyone can actually find the "TOC" on the
site, you’re a better man than I am!  (you probably aren’t, but I’ll say it
anyway just to make you feel good)  Oh wait, here’s something under the
forums (titled "Online Forum Rules", which does not make "TOC"):

[blah blah blah]
Also, effective 7-12-99 if you use any of the following domains, you will
not be able to register to post on this board. If you want to post, you will
have to register using your primary ISP. This is to prevent troublemakers
who have been banned, from creating new aliases and re-registering on the

yahoo.com hotmail.com rocketmail.com deja.com freemail.com home.com

Hmmm…strangely enough, PhDS uses pobox.com.  Oh yeah, he is the Burrito
Supreme Commander…and the master of his domain…heh.


posted by admin in Uncategorized and have Comments (18)

Who is Derek Smart?

And why do you folks hate him? Mesa confused!

posted by admin in Uncategorized and have Comments (7)

BC3K v2.08 Release Candidate 2 Out!

Check the discussion thread for this stable release which fixes *all*
known problems with 3Dfx cards, including the ‘black screen of death’
which happens when switching between sub-systems. It also includes new
dogfighting algorithms.


The version control file shows all fixes in this *unofficial* release
in Red


If all goes well and nothing else crops up, 2.08 should go final
sometime this weekend.

I will also be doing a patch for the 2.0 demo based on this code base,
when it goes final.

Derek Smart, Ph.D.
Designer/Lead Developer
The Battlecruiser Series

"It’s not everyone telling me it can’t be done that bothers me.
It’s them interrupting me while I’m doing it!"

posted by admin in Uncategorized and have No Comments

Be a STAR in StarLancer, AND win a free copy of StarLancer!

Imagine playing Starlancer and when this pilot from your 45th Volunteer
Squadron turns around you see . . . your face!

Starlancer is the eagerly anticipated space combat game from Erin and Chris
Roberts, creators of the popular Wing Commander and Privateer series of
games. Starlancer combines the intense action of first person space combat
with the drama and intrigue of a classic WWII air combat movie.

Five (5) lucky Lanced.net readers will have the chance to have their faces
digitally rendered and placed on pilots in the game and will also receive a
free copy of the game when it is released. Just send your two photographs,
along with your full name and email address, to intwydam…@lanced.net . The
photographs can either be digital or scanned photographs.

Make sure you have good, even lighting. Entries must be received by Tuesday,
August 31st at 11pm PST. The five winners will be chosen at random.


posted by admin in Uncategorized and have No Comments

Re: Win Starlancer before you can buy it!

damn you, beating me to the post :P

-Evan Bangs

ICQ: 18297901
The Forge for StarLancer and FreeLancer News

I’m looking for some cheering up rather than
"going up to the tower and shooting people" kinda
 excitement. -Sum budy

"One of these days I’m gonna believe.  One of these days I’m gonna break
I’m gonna reach into the night and not settle for just the stars.
I’m gonna move right by them.  Come and try to find me in the dark"
– The Lancer’s Dream, By Intwydamalu the Wise

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -

Well Rounded Entertainment wrote in message <37c491df.174111752@news>…
>To celebrate our recent redesign and new partnership agreements, Well
>Rounded Entertainment is offering readers the chance to win a copy of
>Chris and Erin Roberts’ Starlancer before it’s available on store
>shelves. In conjunction with Microsoft, we have arranged for two
>readers to win gold copies of the game, allowing them to start playing
>before the rest of the ‘net. You can enter at

>Win a free copy of Starlancer before you can buy it! Only at WRE!

>Well Rounded Entertainment
>Games. Movies. Music. It’s entertainment: Condensed

posted by admin in Uncategorized and have Comment (1)

Re: Bruce Campell Stars in Tachyon

I cannot remember who that is for the life of me…

-Evan Bangs

ICQ: 18297901
The Forge for StarLancer and FreeLancer News

I’m looking for some cheering up rather than
"going up to the tower and shooting people" kinda
 excitement. -Sum budy

"One of these days I’m gonna believe.  One of these days I’m gonna break
I’m gonna reach into the night and not settle for just the stars.
I’m gonna move right by them.  Come and try to find me in the dark"
– The Lancer’s Dream, By Intwydamalu the Wise

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -

Donald Peterson wrote in message …

>according to the news, Bruce Campbell, the guy from Army Of Darkness and
>Evil dead, is lending his voice for the lead role in Novalogic’s Tachyon
>Space Game. I loved him in Army of Darkness!


posted by admin in Uncategorized and have Comments (2)